The guy above me has a very nice joke

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PLEASE LIKE TO DONATE 50 CENTS TO MY CHARIDY .... SAVE THE PENGUINS IN AFRICA -BY LUKE BRANIFF

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why was the little girl happy? because she found an icecream cone

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how many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? none their all dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Adolf Hitler.

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know I'm not a mind reader.

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What's green and has wheels? a green car.

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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what did the cheese say to the other cheese nothing cheese can't talk

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what happens when you and a 6 foot black guy get stuck on an island? hang him by a tree and make shelter

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

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My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

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What do you call a man looking at Anti jokes on this ? you

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I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

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Q: why was the girl so dumb A: her teacher was a blond

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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