a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

The Detroit Lions

What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

What do you call a black guy with a job? Responsible.

you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, it seem's that someone has been bathroom on my lawn. "Martha, I'm not cleaning this up"

Why is it that all cats dislike flying saucers? The strange noises and lights probably frighten them, as they don't understand the concepts of extra-terrestrial intelligence and space travel.

Adam: knock knock!! Eve: who's there? Adam: don't be silly, just open the f*cking door!!

Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Worlds first anti joke.

Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

Why is cameron haythorp gay? Answer- He showed his willy to robet tuner

Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

There's two sausages in a pan.. One says "Wow it's hot in here" The other says... "agrhhh a talking sausage"

Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

My next door neighbour found out yesterday that I am a serial killer. Knock Knock. [L]

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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