Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

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What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

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How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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