Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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Yes.

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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