Why wouldn't the baby boy stop crying when the babysitter was in the room? Because he put cigarettes out on him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The parking lot was across the street from KFC.

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Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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a disabled person walked into a bar..oh wait

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why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

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why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

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Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

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What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

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What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

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A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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