Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

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Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

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Lol Nerochan, that was like totally awesome!

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Max

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Z.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

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whats difference between womens rights now and 10 years ago? nothing, they are both just lies men tell women to make them feel good.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

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yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

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How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

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knock knock. come in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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You're momma's so fat..Oh wait she's not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops