why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

Why did the boy with cancer cross the road? He was hoping to get hit by a truck.

Please? No.

What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

If 32x=8600, find x. ^ | There it is!

What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

Why did the chicken smoke weed? Because he was black

What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

4

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

An iman, a rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. It's not the same bar. They feel uncomfortable mixing together and this makes me sad.

Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense MICROWAVE

What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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