What's the difference between a Jew and a cucumber? You can't gas a cucumber.

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Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

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Whats green and turns red at the push of a button A frog in a blender

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

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I am a joke. I am funny.

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Womens' sports

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you know what rhymes with sloth. rape

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Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

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Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

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Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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What kind of condoms do cows use? None.

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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