You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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a disabled person walked into a bar..oh wait

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was black

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

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What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

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What do u call a banana? A banana......

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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My heart is in my hands. Or maybe it's yours. Either way it's mine now. You won't need it anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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