Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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69

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5

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Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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sexual intercourse.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Sometimes, people ask me, "Do you always have to be so obnoxious?" And to that I reply, "I don't always, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis." Stay thirsty, my friends.

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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