How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

What did one man say to the other? "hi other man"

Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? A: Pick him up and suck on his wang!

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

How many Nazis does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Their domestic handiness was not impeded by their warped sense of entitlement and racial superiority.

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

Q: what is green, red, white, on fire, in space A: i dont know you tell me

why did the computer crash? it didn't

knock knock who's there? be. be who? *hits you with a batterang. BECAUSE ITS BATMAN

Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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