What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

What did one man say to the other? "hi other man"

Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

Q: what is green, red, white, on fire, in space A: i dont know you tell me

why did the computer crash? it didn't

A newborn, an infant, a teenager, a person in their 20s, a person in the 40s, a person in their 60s, a person in their 70s, a person in their 80s, and a little old lady who is about 105 walk into a bar. Wait, infants can't walk.

Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

There once was a man from Dundee. He got stung by an angry wasp. He put some Bactine on it. He lied down and took a rest He felt much better the next morning.

Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

What's a pirate's favorite school subject? Pirate math.

Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

PENIS

What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

Throw your crépe right into an ocean Where an octopus can get it in all the commotion With the crépe and the ocean and the oc-to-pus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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