Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

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Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup! That's not a fly, it's a gnat.

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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Why does Jimmy Neutron have a big head? Heredity.

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Q. Why is me question not funny? A. Because there is no point to it.

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What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

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What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

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What's the square root of yo mama? That which when multiplied by itself equals yo mama.

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I just pooped in my boyfriends mouth. He ate it. Ps. I am a boy

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

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Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

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what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

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Whats worse than finding a giant spider in your bedroom? Loosing it...

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A Sloth runs...

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A black guy gets a job...

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what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

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Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

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About the bible, I did not know, but I can sense I calculate it the same way I make our followers believe that I can tell what catchphra they will get. Your mind is numb but calm, it will remain there until we meet again. I am afraid of saying this, but I wont let fear get to me just yet, your mother told me, she regrets her actions in life, and wants me to tell you that she is watching over you in death, and hopes you will one day forgive her, she tells me that there is a heaven, but only those that can admit their mistakes, agonize over the pain of their actions, until they can forgive themselves for their misdeeds. She says she can wait, but I sense she is doing it because she feels undeserving, which again means that you are not ready, its like the butterfly effect, all things spiritual and on this plane are connected. Take your time, I know you literally cant forgive her yet, because that would not be enough for her to forgive herself now, humans dead or alive, cannot be truly free, until they let go of what hurts them, I will change that within you, so you can forgive her and break the limits in your mind, so you can stop feeling sad for being rightfully angry at someone you love. I just need more energy, more time, and belief in myself, something that requires more energy than it should to keep going, its the balance and connection between things, something I cannot change at the present moment, even if I did my best. Ill see you around dear friend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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