Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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Lets just say that we are beyond the stage where I am "just" trying, by the way, you might want to search that last comment for double negatives. Or you know NOT NOT. Do not take my word for it, but if I am not wrong, the bacteria (yogurt) leaves afterwards, so you are eating milk that has been eaten and then.. You know... A common "side effect" of hypnosis, is that when it is used, the one hypnotized (both in this case) end up feeling a "strange" case of closeness, stronger bonds, friendship etc, scientists wonder why... ITS LIKE DUH! WE BOTH REVEAL DEEP SECRETS TO EACH OTHER! THINGS WE DO NOT EVEN USUALLY TELL OURSELVES! Its a literal no brainer, scientits can go fuck themselves, because as far as I know, thats the only fuck they ever get.

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Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

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A woman walks into the bathroom and hears the sound of moaning. Not sure what to do she looks around and sees couples as far as the eye can see. She quickly turns to the woman and man standing next to her and asks what is going on here?! The woman says can't you read this is not a bathroom this is a public sex room! Only an idiot would ask that question. In shock the woman takes another look around and she spots someone she finds familiar. When she walks closer she finds that it is her boyfriend and that he is with another woman. Furious she walks up to him and slaps him in the face. The boyfriend looks at her and says sorry your sex just got old. Furious she says to him we never had sex!

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What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

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what did the photographer tell the model? You're ugly.

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Why Do Girls Have holes?? For the guys poles.

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

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What's the difference between an orange? A bycicle you fool, a vest doens't have sleeves

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A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

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a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

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why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

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Have you seen Ray Charles' house? No. Neither has he...

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

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They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

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Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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