My mate mated with my mate's mate. mated of course meaning fucked.

I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

In soviet russia, roses are violet

Health food.

What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

Q: What did Yoda do at the end of star wars when he lost his light saber? A: He asked the prop guy if he had any more and he happened to have another and they went on with making the great film many still love today.

How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

The Rock: What is your name? Jeff: My name is... The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!

I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

Your Mom!!!

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

YES! EXACTLY!

Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

sharks

What happens when a black person brakes his neck? He gets a neck brace just like anyone else.

A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

tee hee

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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