Q. What's brown and sticky? A. A stick.

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An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

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you wanna hear a funny joke? so do I

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

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Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

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What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

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What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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Why couldn't the black man swim. Because he had never been taught.

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

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Knock Knock. Who'se there? It's Dave. Dave who? Um, you invited me over here. Open the damn door.

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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What do you call two black guys holding up a store? Really strong.

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why didn't Johnny get into college? Because Johnny is retarded.

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is this the krusty krab? no this is smooth lobster.

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Your mom is like a tire iron: she's a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops