What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

you are getting chased by a lion, a tiger, and a zebra. What do you do???? Get off the Merry-go-round.

What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

Q. what is the difference between a black man and a park bench A. a parkbench can support a family A black man cannot

why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

Why did the first elephant fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? PEER PRESSURE!

How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

This one time at band camp music was played.

whats the difference between and clorox wipe and a paper towel? a clorox wipe is wet.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Not all black people are skilled at basketball

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

Knock Knock Come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...