Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

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Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "i have aids."

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The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

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is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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Sally went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. She was exhausted and died of dehydration at the top.

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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Why was the boy hit by a bus? Because the driver is a homicidal sociopath.

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What is human, went bankrupt eight times, got a small loan of a million dollars, and is over all a terrible person? Your probably thinking Donald Trump Well your correct.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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On a deserted island in the middle of nowhere three women have just been in a horrible boat wreck. They are okay and alive. One is a lovely smart brunette. An appealing ginger. And a blond.. named Becky. They take shelter when one of them notices a shimmer in the sand. They pick it up to discover that it was a golden lamp. They rub it and a blue cloud of smoke consumes them. Then a magnificent Guinnie appears and says "You have awoken me from my 10,000 year encasement inside that lamp! I shall grant you 3 wishes to show you my sincere gratitude." The brunette wishes for a plane so she can fly home. The ginger wishes for a boat to sail back home. The blonde was lonely so she wished that the brunette and the ginger were back with her.

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Why do Native Americans own Casinos? Because it's a very profitable business situation.

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Anti-Jokes are the bomb .org

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

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why is rebecca black? because it's friday.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Your dads dead. lol

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Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

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What smells like satans pubic hair and dresses like a woman? Vinny Trolia

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What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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