Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

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Why did the sheep cry? Because it contracted cancer

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Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

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why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

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How do you kill a blonde? Throw a fridge at her

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wommmoaooammaaa

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Knock Knock Come in.

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One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

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Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

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Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

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How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

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Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

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Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

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I STUCK MY TESTICLE IN A BLENDER!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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