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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

Q: Why did Temia go to sleep? A: Cause swaq and she was so skuxx!

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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