A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

Miley Cyrus.

How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

My dad went into Home Depot, he went in to get garage door part, he took an hour and came back out with three things.

How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

Tyler: Hey, James if you were a cavemen you would die. James: Why? Tyler: Because everybody hates you.

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

385

Yes.

whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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