Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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5

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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sexual intercourse.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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What's the difference between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee? Bruce Lee's dead.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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You copy and paster!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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