A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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Har har hey

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

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What was the reason for the confused looking woman staring at the can of frozen Apple juice for twenty minutes? Some cans are difficult to open: The little ring bit comes off when you pull it, and then you have to work out a new way to open it, which takes patience and ingenuity.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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Women's Rights.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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