A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

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What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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How long is a china man?

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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What did johanne buy when she got pregnant? A staircase

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Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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how do you make your mom mad? mushroom stamp her face

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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these are shit

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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where do some birds live in? Earth

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Colby Michael Schluter

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Why does Frank hate Jim? He killed his son.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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What do ghosts get whaen they watch porn ? a boner

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What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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