What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

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I asked a girl on a date. She said no.

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What time is it? 20:45.

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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You mom is so fat she appeals to my secret fetish.

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What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

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OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

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learn the ropes?

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What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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