two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What was the leg less and armless mans favorite type of music? Nubstep

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Haikus are easy. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

thumb_up thumb_down -27

yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up you retarded poet!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Two muffins are in the oven, One says "Damn it, so hot in here," The other one says " Wow! Muffin which can talk!"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A muslim is working quietly in his 3rd floor apartment complex bedroom. ~~~~ He's been working on high explosives for 8 months now, preparing to kill innocent people.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb...1 How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb...2

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He didn't, the farm this chicken was on had fences bordering it to avoid this very situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What do you call a man who was just struck in the head with a bowling ball? An ambulance would be the most appropriate thing to call since this man just sustained a serious head injury and medical responders should be contacted, lest his brain start hemorrhaging.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops