A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red. The sentence before was completely irrelevant, but I needed something to say before I tell you, Your family's been murdered by the KKK.

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Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

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How many Jews does it take to fill a shower? As many as it does to fill an ash tray.

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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where does a person with one leg work? anywere

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

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Knock knock Who's there? No one you care bout so why did u say who's there?

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What's worse than seeing 5 dead babies on the side of the road? Realizing slavery is banned after buying a perfectly good young black male for a reasonable price at your local walmart.

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So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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Q: What did the Black man say to the kool ade Man? A: You're not real -BonkersLive

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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What did George Washingtn say to is men before crossing the Delaware? Men, get in the boat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops