"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

a horse nibbled a baby

Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

i died. new product by steve jobs

Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

wanna hear a joke? yes

What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

Sarah Palin

- I got kicked out of the library today. - why? - because I put the women's rights book in the fiction section

A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...