What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

Guess what! what haha u listened to me

What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

Kim Kardashian got a job.

never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

Dos Equis took down chuck Norris

A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

What do ghosts get whaen they watch porn ? a boner

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being in an abusive relationship.

What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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