Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the diffrence between a monkey... An apple because the more the much. :) :| :| :|

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

oh hai

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

thumb_up thumb_down -4

All the other dinosaurs were laughing and teasing the tyrannosaurus because of his tiny arms. They left and the T.rex was sobbing uncontrollably next to a giant fern. "What's the matter little fellow?" said Jesus. The crying dinosaur looked down and said "I That's the end of my stupid puppet show, cuz I couldn't think of anything a blubbering dinosaur would say to our Lord and saviour.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black man with a blond beard came to deliver me a pizza. I paid him, tipped him, and closed my door. I forgot the pizza. Dammit.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why did the black man call the white man a rasict? A:because he called him black.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops