A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

what's black and white? everything. i'm a dog

whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

What's better than winning the paraplegic Olympics? Walking.

Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a rapist

Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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