ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

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What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

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What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven murdered sixes wife and kids and said he was next.

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How does shit taste?\ Good.

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"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

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A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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lipstick pig

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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Yo mama's so fat because she has a glandular disorder that makes her fat.

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hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

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What did the fan of Justin Beiber say? Nothing there are no fans.

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Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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Know what would be awkward, if a GPS told a gay guy to get straight.

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When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

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What'f funny and has 8 wheels? The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels

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out of your comfort zone

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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