How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

so... how about that airplane food

I was Writing and i broke my pencil

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

Why didn't the blind girl go to the party? She wasn't invited!

So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

kevin kim

I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

Michael Jackson walks into a daycare center.

what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

Statistically speaking, one out if every seven dwarves are unhappy

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

fava beans

Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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