What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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Where do you go when you die? Nowhere

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So it was 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar......I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ended up getting nuked

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

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It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

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Q: Why did the cow cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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potatoes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

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Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

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What's the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Where does someone who has lost his arm, has a bleeding head, is mentally ill, has strep throat, and lung cancer go? Too late, they died.

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

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what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

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you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

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Hey do you want to hear the joke about my d**k?? I cant tell it because it's to long

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If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

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Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs go for christmas? Cancer

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops