It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

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How many Jews does it take to fill a shower? As many as it does to fill an ash tray.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one you care bout so why did u say who's there?

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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How did the young child react when a bullet went through his head? He fell to the ground and his heart stopped beating.

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whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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What did George Washingtn say to is men before crossing the Delaware? Men, get in the boat.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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Do you know what color comes after 9?

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So how does the chicken cross the road? He doesn't, chickens live on farms.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

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A man walks into a bar, a man behind him doesn't.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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