2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

Simon says; "You're adopted."

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

I'm hungry.

what do you call a cow? A cow

After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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