Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

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Gingers.

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The Christian Bible.

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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Whats better then having 10 fingers Having 11

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What's worse than a Holocaust in your apple? What.

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a dead moose, In my basement.

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Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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im a dragon, no im not

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What did the hungry man do? He ate.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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Whats the best part about being alive? Not getting hit by a bus

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

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Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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