What has wings and can't fly? What has legs and can't move? What has mouth and can't eat? A dead bird on the road

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

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kcuf read it backwards

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

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Why is cameron haythorp gay? Answer- He showed his willy to robet tuner

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what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

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women's rights

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Q: what happed to the squirrel that lost his nuts? A: it died

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Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

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Why is chad so gay? Its his choice.

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whats the difference between G. Bush and a rock? Bush (bull)shits and rock doesn't

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What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

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I don't know what was a bigger disappointment, the series finale of "Lost" or--sorry I thought I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

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Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she get up? She had no legs. *Knock knock* Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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sky's the limit said the tree a.w. j.p.

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What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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