Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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who wants to hear a joke about the broken pencil? to late, its sharpened

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How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

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a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

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Wanna hear a joke? Denver Broncos.

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Justin Bieber.

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ahmadinejad. Well then get the **** away from my door!

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How many immature people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 69

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Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

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A rapist is asked to teach a kindergarden class. The kids learn many things and have a great day.

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What's the opposite of stupid? diputs

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knock knock? who's there the stubt double vampire that's going to kill you;0

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What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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WEED!

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Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

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What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

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what do you call a bear with socks on A bear with socks on

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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