What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

Donkey lips

roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

Knock knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Leukemia.

How do you make Chuck Norris cry? Kill his family.

What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what did one pedophile say to the other at the playground? DIBZ!!!

What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

How do you make an elf sad? Murder his family.

What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

What does Kim Kardashian and a Navy Vessel have in common? They are both full of seamen!

Roses are red Violets are blue I shit my pants do you want my poo.

A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

What do you call a retarded black man? His name

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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