Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

Knock Knock? Who's there? How did you know it was me?

Why couldn't Sally ride a bike? She was disabled

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

You are Nerochan right?

Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

Hey, how much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to drown as a result of climate change.

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

What's the difference between a water melon and a baby? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other's just a water melon.

What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

Hillary Clinton

What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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