Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

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I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Yo mamas so fat, that I need a new pair of sunglasses.

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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Why I the kid still at school? His mom was brutally run over by a car

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Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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How many Mexicans can you fit into a car? The bathroom is on the left, mam.

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

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knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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