2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

thumb_up thumb_down -37

385

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than ten dead babies? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

thumb_up thumb_down -26

So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +119

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops