Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

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What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

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the asian kid gets an F

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

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A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

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Hillary Clinton

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if quiz is quizzal whats test?

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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