How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

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A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

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Why did Kelliintheraw get punched in the face? Because she is a dumbass

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How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

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What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

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Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead why did the dog fall out of the tree? because it was attached to the monkey

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homework

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Women's Rights.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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What's the same between a mole and an eagle? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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TIMMAH!

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had Gonorrhea.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Why is a charlie horse called a charlie horse? Well there was this boy charlie and he had a horse and it died in a fire.

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What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops