LIFE :(

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the diffrence between a monkey... An apple because the more the much. :) :| :| :|

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

YES! EXACTLY!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

thumb_up thumb_down -5

XD, Okay, but you gotta marry me too XD Its working again I am skipping class tonight, how about you come by uh, the day after tomorrow? And bring condoms I don't have any.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the white girl fuck the mexican? Because her teacher told her to do an "essay"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's the difference between a Chicken and a Triceratops? A: One is a Chicken and One is a Triceratops.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is similar between a penguin and a newspaper? If you kill a penguin, then grind it up into a fine powder, then the penguin becomes a newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

you know what rhymes with sloth. rape

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops