What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

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what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

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what do you call a 19th century steam train driver ? i dont know , depends what his mother named him

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What did the man and woman do in bed together? Sleep.

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knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

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Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

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#Hanging Degus

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Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

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What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

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Why did the black man die of leukemia? Overexposure to radioactive materials due to his career as a nuclear engineer.

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What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

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Why did the Asian man go to bed? Because he was tired

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Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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A retarded man walks into a bar and everyone was polite about his disability.

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Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

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What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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