how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

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What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

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why is my phone broken i dropped it

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

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Cripples are lame.

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poop

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Heisenberg...

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How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

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look in the sky! its a bird, its a plane........ Its Miles

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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Harry Chappell raped someone

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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A handicapp walks into a bar

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A white person at Harvard

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A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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