2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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what sucks? things that suck

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops