Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

Get in the car.

Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

Miley Cyrus.

The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

i like cats

PATHETIC

A baby seal walks into a club.

A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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