John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

women's rights

what did the bee do when bill tried to slap it it stung bill and died.

How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

Who saw 9/11 as a miracle? The undertakers

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

What's black & sits at the top of the staircase? A quadriplegic after a house fire.

I just found out i have cancer.

A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

What do you call a not as grumpy Jewish man in his mid 30s? Danny. What do you call 5 of his best friends? Arin, Suzy, Barry, Ninja Brian, And Ross. Another possible answer to the 1st question is currently not married.

My son won the lottery. I shot him so I could have the money.

"Why Do Dogs Bark ? " Because Thats What Their Suppose To Do !

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? You can't unload a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

Why did the Irishman walk out of the bar? He didn't. He's Irish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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