An airplane has 100 bricks on-board. If you drop one brick, how many bricks would be left? 99 -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put a giraffe inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put the giraffe inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you put an elephant inside a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put the elephant inside, close the refrigerator. -------------------------------------------------------------------- The Lion King gathered all the animals from the land to a meeting. Everyone came, except one. Who was the animal? The elephant. He's still inside the refrigerator. ------------------------------------------------------------------- You want to cross a river, but you know that there are crocodiles there. There is no bridge, vines to swing from, etc. How do you cross the river? Swim across the river. The crocodiles are at the meeting with The Lion King. ------------------------------------------------------------------- So you swimmed over the river, but how did you still die? You were hit by the brick falling from the airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

At home, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 10 mins, it's 3:30. At school, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 20 mins, it's 3:40 and schools been finished for ten minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the blackjack player gamble every night and day and not eat, sleep, or use the bathroom? To practice for a tournament in which the grand prize was to save his dying grandmother.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Whats blue and fluffy A: Blue fluff Q: Whats brown and fluffy . A: The bear that killed my parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call the CEO of a successful company? Rich.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Are you gay? No. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why are all blondes dumb? They are not all dumb but constant bullying just saying blondes are just pretty gives them that illogical stereo type

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

captcha: all yer base

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops